1-2-1: Reduced friction isn’t alignment

I keep hearing the same story from product leaders: the exec review that went sideways despite months of stakeholder alignment.

Your last planning meeting felt smooth. Everyone nodded. No one pushed back. And you walked out slightly uneasy without knowing why.

1 Principle

Alignment is behaviour under pressure, not agreement in a room.

Agreement in a calm room is free. It costs nothing to nod. Alignment has a price: giving up your team's engineer, deprioritising your initiative, publicly backing a direction you're not sure about. The price is what reveals who was actually aligned. Most leaders never test for it because the calm room feels like progress. The real test is what happens when priorities compete and alignment costs someone something.

2 Things Top of Mind

#1 Silence is not buy-in

The pattern looks the same every time. They're doing everything right: involving stakeholders in key meetings, sending updates, checking in. Everyone nods. Then it falls apart. Harsh feedback. Sometimes outright hostility. Turns out the stakeholders were building toward something different the whole time. They never actually agreed. They just didn't say so.

This week: In your next roadmap decision meeting, ask: "What would make this a no?" Then wait. Write down the top two answers. If you get none, you have compliance, not commitment.

#2 Turn pushback into conditions

You're in a stakeholder review. Someone raises an objection but won't say what they actually want. You counter with data. They counter with a different concern. The goalposts move. The real issue is they're protecting something they haven't named yet. Their team's bandwidth, their credibility, their territory.

This week: Next time a stakeholder raises a vague objection, open a shared doc or grab a whiteboard. Say: "Let me capture what this needs to protect for you." Write down each condition as they talk. Confirm each one back. You've just turned a circular conversation into a requirements list they've committed to out loud.

1 Question

Where are you mistaking quiet for commitment?